They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. I’ve given up on social media, the Facebook, the twitter, the instagram, and it’s a weird feeling. Mostly because I have that feeling of ‘missing out’ although even when I was on the platforms, nobody was posting anything that I felt was relevant or interesting anyway, but it’s that ‘what if’. I don’t have a large social circle anyway, and people would never actually include me in their posts but if there’s someone I see out and about that I want to find out more about, then suddenly that option is now removed and I really don’t know how to feel about it.

I never used Twitter to the extent most people do, mostly I would check it once a week and see what Elon was up to, or Linode, or Unraid, I don’t follow people and I never take part but still that lack of the human connection, I guess, is now missing and its amazing the effect (affect) it has on the human psyche.

So what is there to do? As I sit here and type the prose that nobody is actually ever going to read… what is the social experience, where is that outlet of interacting with people and solidifying that human connection. Well, it’s nowhere. It has to be taken outside of the virtual experience and into the ‘real world’. The problem really though is that I hate people and that 90% of the fucks have nothing interesting to say other than commenting on the weather or repeating whatever they read in the ‘red top rags’. So fuck em.

Meh, I guess Ill just go without until I find the need to reregister, or look someone up. Because… boobs.

T’rah!

A line from a high-powered Prodigy track, but really hoping that the stress of working life, personal life is easing off. 

Ticking the boxes of trying to keep people happy, and at some point Ill work on making myself happy too. Looking forward to some time off in April, a trip away in May, damn I need a vacation!

Still looking for something interesting to write about, the next thing may be about Hackintoshing with old PC parts as it’s basically impossible to buy a graphics card for RRP these days. I seriously don’t want to pay a grand or more for a £400 graphics card.

Ugh.

So much to tell and nothing I really want to share. 2022 really has to be better than the last one, or the one before that etc but it tends to get to the point where even hoping it’s going to be better is just lining oneself up for disappointment.

I don’t mean to be truly miserable, but if I wait for some good news to post then, well, it’ll be even more months before I post something on here 🙂

Naked Britney will have to do!

So I have a PC, a Mac Mini and my iPad Pro M1 (yey) all set up on two old glass desks, against the red wall with the sex-handprints still all over it. Its crap. I mean it all works fine, and the individual tech items are fine but man the wall and the floor and the rug and this fucking room do my head in. I need to make a change, but this is all going to have to wait till next year till I get some more space in a new place.

I really hope it all comes together, give me six months and hopefully I’ll get there. It doesnt really help that Ive spent the last few hours watching office tours of peoples sweet ass ‘working from home’ setups. Sigh.

We cannot change the past. Our present is determined by what has happened before and what we expect to come in the future. Our future is based on the path we travel now, before, and the path of everyone else around us from the beginning of time.

Free will, therefore, is an illusion.

I’m dealing with a recent family loss, I cannot change what has happened. I move forward because I know it’s my path.

It still doesn’t make it any fucking easier.

Summer is a bitch and I hate it. That is all.

I’ve even invested in a pair of shorts, I’m not sure the world is ready for that one but I blame you global warming, thanks Obama!

Pray for me, I’m so tired. I don’t want to have to deal with the people on this planet anymore. Thanks.

Survived the first COVID jab, which is good I guess. Not so good was the pain in my arm and the reminder of the fatigue over the past couple of days but thankfully it’s wearing off. Lymph nodes under my arm feel slightly swollen but this is apparently normal, hopefully not a bit of cancer…. I mean, I dont want to get COVID again but cancer is very much tied for first place of the C words I dont want to wake up with one day.

I’m sure it will be fine.

I have twitter but I rarely check it, it’s more of a ‘something I do sitting on the toilet’ social event to see what’s going on in the world while I have a few minutes to myself with nothing else to do. COVID still doesnt seem to want to leave me alone so, when bored, I hop on and have a look.

My email provider, Protonmail, has had a downtime this morning – on a Monday morning, ffs – and I expressed my exasperation at not being able to receive important emails (due to the above health issue). Now credit where credit is due, they fixed the issue within a couple of hours and all seems fine, but the mob mentality of those jumping to respond was just something I guess Im not used to.

I know everyone is entitled to their own opinions and that’s fine, I accept it. Say what you want, Im thick skinned! I guess it was just the rapid influx of messages saying that ‘you’re wrong’, then the replies to those defending the end-user, and the replies to those on the other side of the argument – mental!

I think I’ll just go back to being an occasional viewer on the toilet 🙂

Not too long after the last post I came down with a cold and COVID. It was awful. Now after almost two weeks of being isolated I can legally go out and exercise to see whether or not my lungs would explode or hold up to the task of walking around in fresh air.

Thankfully all was fine. Just a short walk around the neighbourhood and then home. I’ve been off work (obvs) and I feel strong enough now to return next week should all remain well.

I cant lie, it’s been super depressing during lockdown anyway but then to be hit with COVID out of nowhere was just too much to bear. I live with older relatives who unfortunately contracted it from me but we are all doing much better now. I really hope I never catch it again, but its one of those things (like the common cold) that it seems will be here to stay from now on. We can only hope that the vaccines, whenever they manifest for our age groups, will lessen the spread of the illness. Hopefully…