Imagine you’re going about your daily life. You get up, you get showered and dressed, you go out the door and leave and go shopping, or to see a friend. You go to pay your bills. You go to Ikea, Tesco, Walmart or Walgreens. You buy a coffee table in the shape of a yingyang and get it delivered next day. Whatever.

Now imagine that outside your house, and at the bottom of your street is a cave. In this cave is not your power animal, as Fight Club would have you believe, but a bear. It’s sleeping. It’s quiet.

You can go about your daily life and ignore the cave, you don’t need to go in there, you don’t need to acknowledge it. It exists, but it is not important so long as you do not go in there.

The bear, the entity, is kind, it’s cuddly, it can provide warmth as well as protection from predators beneath it. It can give you hope that, as long as it exists, all will remain peaceful and calm.

However, don’t fuck with the bear.

If you choose to poke the bear, to make fun of it, to rouse it from it’s sleep for no good reason and anger it, then it will tear off your fucking face and eat your corpse as it lays twitching on the floor.

Leave the fucking bear alone. Do not disturb it. Do not anger it. For it will bring chaos and pain like you cannot imagine.

I am the bear. And people do not leave me alone…

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. I’ve given up on social media, the Facebook, the twitter, the instagram, and it’s a weird feeling. Mostly because I have that feeling of ‘missing out’ although even when I was on the platforms, nobody was posting anything that I felt was relevant or interesting anyway, but it’s that ‘what if’. I don’t have a large social circle anyway, and people would never actually include me in their posts but if there’s someone I see out and about that I want to find out more about, then suddenly that option is now removed and I really don’t know how to feel about it.

I never used Twitter to the extent most people do, mostly I would check it once a week and see what Elon was up to, or Linode, or Unraid, I don’t follow people and I never take part but still that lack of the human connection, I guess, is now missing and its amazing the effect (affect) it has on the human psyche.

So what is there to do? As I sit here and type the prose that nobody is actually ever going to read… what is the social experience, where is that outlet of interacting with people and solidifying that human connection. Well, it’s nowhere. It has to be taken outside of the virtual experience and into the ‘real world’. The problem really though is that I hate people and that 90% of the fucks have nothing interesting to say other than commenting on the weather or repeating whatever they read in the ‘red top rags’. So fuck em.

Meh, I guess Ill just go without until I find the need to reregister, or look someone up. Because… boobs.

T’rah!

A line from a high-powered Prodigy track, but really hoping that the stress of working life, personal life is easing off. 

Ticking the boxes of trying to keep people happy, and at some point Ill work on making myself happy too. Looking forward to some time off in April, a trip away in May, damn I need a vacation!

Still looking for something interesting to write about, the next thing may be about Hackintoshing with old PC parts as it’s basically impossible to buy a graphics card for RRP these days. I seriously don’t want to pay a grand or more for a £400 graphics card.

Ugh.

So much to tell and nothing I really want to share. 2022 really has to be better than the last one, or the one before that etc but it tends to get to the point where even hoping it’s going to be better is just lining oneself up for disappointment.

I don’t mean to be truly miserable, but if I wait for some good news to post then, well, it’ll be even more months before I post something on here 🙂

Naked Britney will have to do!

So I have a PC, a Mac Mini and my iPad Pro M1 (yey) all set up on two old glass desks, against the red wall with the sex-handprints still all over it. Its crap. I mean it all works fine, and the individual tech items are fine but man the wall and the floor and the rug and this fucking room do my head in. I need to make a change, but this is all going to have to wait till next year till I get some more space in a new place.

I really hope it all comes together, give me six months and hopefully I’ll get there. It doesnt really help that Ive spent the last few hours watching office tours of peoples sweet ass ‘working from home’ setups. Sigh.